Contemplating the big questions

Lately, I've been musing. Alot. I've had the time to: six weeks ago I gave birth to my third child, and we spend many hours nursing. My two older children are in school, and my partner takes on a fair share of household responsibilities. And so, more than any other time in my memory, I have time to muse. I could have called this post "Thoughts while nursing" or "The meaning of life" or "Who am I?" My brain is on overdrive.

Whilst musing, I've come up with a few questions and fewer answers. What is my potential? How do I define success? What do I truly want? What is the meaning of it all?

I realize how much I've grown in my lifetime, what hurdles I've overcome, and what blessings I've been dealt. I'm a good mother. I'm a caring friend. I love easily and deeply. I cherish my days. I am a chronic procrastinator. I fail to plan. I want to live with integrity and honesty, but in all honesty I know that I sometimes bend with the wind and avoid painful truth. I am brilliantly smart. I am fiercely proud. I carry shame. I love my life.

I am seeking nothing more and nothing less than to live a life that is meaningful. I want to wake each day with clearly defined purpose. I want the thrill of meeting a goal. I want to impart a sense of joy and success to my children and those I meet. Most of all, I want to be heard. I'm looking forward to this blog as a place to state my particular viewpoints to the world.

Thanks for listening.